Hwai May's Testimony of Thanksgivings

"An extract of my thoughts.. There are many thanksgivings and 3 of which I must share.

Thank God for the peace He gives amidst all the confusion and uncertainty. Although I cringed every time during the taking blood time or changing of the drip, being injected and finally the extracting of my marrow, I was honestly very afraid of the impending pain. Yet this peace enabled sweet rest through the nights and a comforting assurance in the day. Only God can give this unexplainable peace that can never be substituted.

Second I thank everyone of you reading this blog and covering me with your prayers, encouraging me with your jia yous, your cards, flowers, fruits, food etc, smses, notes, cds, books, teddies, pillows, words, presence have all been too generously lavished upon me :) Never have I felt so pampered and received so much! There are too many to name but I remember each of you with much love and gratitude.

Third, I'm very thankful for this "on the job" training for ministry. This time of application gave me a fresh understanding of God's Word. I'm blessed with a loving family, wonderful colleagues, beautiful bunch of cell pple n many close buddies. And what about adversity, sickness, pain and inconveniences? If we accept good from God, shall we not also accept evil? What I have been teaching others flooded my mind. Even a simple reminder that "Jesus loves you, that is what you have been teaching your kids" would cause tears to swell. Thank God for His precious Word and the ability to take it and use it in the time of need. Reading Job, Psalms and Philippians during this period has been a uniquely different experience. Through this, God answered my prayers to experience His Word in greater reality and made my commitment to Him, not just a lip service but, a whole hearted surrender.

If i can pray and praise God in good times, I must also do so in sickness and troubled times.. And even more so because that's when we can no longer depend on ourselves and need His ever sufficient grace. Suffering is part of true discipleship and I believe that whatever the circumstances, it's always to draw man into a deeper relationship with Him.

We may never understand God's ways and plans fully with our limited minds but one thing is for sure. Everything is out of the abundant love, infinite wisdom and amazing grace of our sovereign God. The physical pain, which may be so exasperating and trying, serves to remind me of the pain that Christ bore for me on the cross at Calvary. I was sharing to zhi that I thought I would get "immuned" to the pain after a while, but on the contrary the pain, being a daily affair, was getting unbearable. It makes me so vulnerable that I just crumble at the onset of each jab and test procedure. How much more unbearable it must have been for Christ, a Man of Sorrow, and acquainted with much grief and pain. Not only did He not crumble and give in, He embraced each lash of the whip, each piercing of the nail, each second of suffocation willingly as His great love and compassion for man and obedience to God demanded it. Such affliction was so that wretched man can be cleansed of their sins and drawn near to God.

No man is safe from the attacks of illness and pain, the body will corrupt and life is unpredictable but the hope and certainty lies in the peace and confidence we have in Christ for the present future. Knowing God is that guarantee. One of my favourite verses is this. "Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is renewed day by day. For our light affliction which is but for a moment is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory. While we do not look at the things which are seen but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporal but the things which are not seen are eternal" -- 1 Cor 4:16-18.

May you, through this testmony, desire to know the Almighty God. Trust in Him for only He alone is our comforter and strength, peace and joy at all times. Just as His rod and staff was my guide and protection, He has shown His love and faithfulness to you through His Son Jesus Christ.

Jesus loves you this i know, for the Bible tells me so."

-- Hwai May